Updated on September 4, 2022

15 Ways on How to Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

You've tried everything to win her back, including begging and pleading. You've even gone to extreme lengths to make sure she sees how much you miss her. And still nothing seems to work.

Maybe she's just too stubborn to come around. Or maybe she's already moved on.

If you want her back, you'll have to work at it.

Here are 15 ways on how to get your ex-girlfriend back that you can try. 

1. Remember Why She First Liked You

When I was single, I used to tell my friends that I wasn't looking for anything serious. I just wanted someone to go out with occasionally. But I knew deep down that I really did want something deeper. And I didn't know what that meant. So I asked myself: "What do I like about me?"

I realized that there are lots of reasons people fall in love. They see something special about themselves that makes them attractive to others. Maybe they're funny, or smart, or strong, or sexy, or generous, or compassionate. 

Understanding what it is she likes about you will give you an edge when trying to get her back. If you don't understand this, then you'll be at a disadvantage.

2. Let Her Remember the Good Times

If you had some great memories together (hopefully you did!) then it would't hurt to text her once in a while and say, "hey, remember when we..." and so forth.

This will remind her of the fun times you shared together. It could also remind her of all the things you have in common.

3. Get Her to Chase You

If you want to win her back, do something unexpected. If she thinks she knows everything there is to know about you, she'll stop trying to find out more. So, surprise her. Send her a text saying "I miss you." Or send her flowers. Surprise her with a gift. Call her unexpectedly. Let her know you care enough to call. Do anything that makes her feel special.

Don't go overboard though. If she thinks you don't need her, you'll become even more appealing to her.

4. Don’t Be Too Desperate

Don't be too desperate. You accomplish this by the following:

1. Be Cool and Confident - This is probably the most important thing that you can do. If you come off as desperate, then she'll see right through you. Instead, try to be cool and confident. This way, she'll believe that you're ready to move on.

2. Act Like You Don't Care - If you truly miss her, then it's okay to admit that you do. However, if you act like you don't even care, then she'll start thinking that maybe you still want to be together.

3. Give Her Time To Come Around - When you finally decide to give up on trying to win her back, then don't push her to make a decision. Just give her time to come around. She might realize that she doesn't want to be with you anymore.

4. Don't Try Too Hard - If you keep trying to contact her over and over again, then she'll think you're crazy. So, don't act like you want to talk to her every day. Just wait until she wants to hear from you.

5. Don't Do Anything Crazy - If you do anything crazy, such as breaking into her house or stalking her, then she won't think twice about taking you back. So, just remember that you're better than that.

5. Pull Away a Little Bit

Pulling away a little is absolutely essential if you want to keep the love alive. This is because when you pull away a little, then she feels that she's not the one who wants to be alone anymore. She'll start feeling like you're still interested in being with her.

Don't pull away too much. If you do, then she'll start thinking that maybe there's someone else out there who's better than you.

So what does this mean? Well, if you pull away a little bit, then she'll feel that she's not just the only one who wants you. So she'll feel loved and wanted by YOU.

And that's exactly how you want her to feel about herself.

6. Don’t Be Too Nice

Nice guys are everywhere. They’re easy to find. You might think it’s impossible to avoid them entirely. After all, there are plenty of men out there who aren’t jerks—they’re just really friendly.

But here’s the thing: nice guys don’t always turn into good boyfriends. In fact, some are downright toxic. And while most women won’t admit this publicly, they do actually prefer the jerk over the nice guy. Why? Because a jerk isn’t afraid to show his true colors. He doesn’t pretend to care about them when he doesn’t. He tells us exactly how he feels.

And because women want someone honest, someone who says what they mean and means what they say, women tend to appreciate guys who are willing to call them out they've done something wrong. They will give him their best shot, and he’ll tell them where they screwed up. This makes them feel valued, respected, and loved.

So what do you do? You have to be strong and stand up for yourself. You can't let her walk all over you. If you don't stand up for yourself, you'll never get anywhere in life. So you need to learn how to speak up for yourself. Don't let her think you're weak.

7. Remember Why You Split Up

When we fall out with someone, there are usually three reasons why we do it. We might feel hurt, angry or jealous. Or maybe we just want to vent our frustration.

Whatever the reason, it doesn't matter how big or small the issue is. If you're trying to make up again, remember what drove you apart in the first place.

8. Give Her Space

If you're still hurting over what happened in your relationship, there's no reason to rush into getting back together with your ex girlfriend. Sure, she might want to see you again, but you shouldn't make her wait too long. In fact, according to experts, you should give her some space. After all, she needs time to heal and process everything that went down in the relationship.

So, how much time should you give her?

Well, the answer depends on a couple different factors. If you broke up because of something major like cheating, then you'll probably need to give her some time to come to terms with that.

But if it was just a minor issue, such as arguments or disagreements, then you can probably go ahead and talk to her sooner rather than later.

9. Don’t Be Too Clingy

You know what it's like to be too clingy. You're so afraid of losing someone that you don't let them go. You're always calling and text messaging them, even if they don't want to talk to or see you. You're always trying to make sure they notice you by doing things like buying them expensive presents or taking them places.

But what does "being too clingy" really look like?

Here are some common signs that you might be too clingy:

1. You call/text her constantly.

2. If she says no, you keep asking.

3. You try to get her to change her mind about something.

4. You buy her gifts.

5. You ask her to meet you somewhere.

6. You beg her to forgive you.

7. You make excuses for her mistakes.

8. You act needy.

Don't be that guy. Have some self respect and it will show you are worthy of her.

10. Become A Better Version of Yourself

The objective of every relationship is to become a better version of ourselves. We want our partner to love us just like we love ourselves. However, sometimes we don't know how to go about doing this. So here are some tips on how to become a better version yourself.

1. Be honest with yourself. You'll always know what you're good at and what you aren't. If you think you're not good at something, ask someone else to help you out. Learn from others.

2. Practice self-care. This includes taking care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, etc. Don't neglect yourself. This is important because if you do, you won't be able to give anything to anyone else.

3. Set goals. Write down your goals for each day. Make sure you accomplish those goals.

4. Have fun. Even though you're trying to improve yourself, you still need to enjoy life. Don't let work take over your life.

5. Take action. Once you've set your goals, make sure you act upon them.

6. Keep learning. Read books, watch movies, listen to music, learn languages, etc.

11. Try to Become Her Friend

You might think that becoming a friend to your ex girlfriend is a bad idea to win her back but it's not. It's actually one of the best ways to get your ex girlfriend to fall in love with you again. Here's why...

When you become friends with an ex girlfriend, you're showing her that you have other interests besides just having sex with her. She'll start thinking about you more positively. And when she starts thinking about you more positively, she'll could potentially start falling in love with you again.

So if you want her back in your life, you should definitely try to become her friend.

12. Increase Frequency and Intensity of Your Interaction With Her

After you've reached "friend" status with your ex-girlfriend, the next step in winning her back is to increase the frequency and intensity of your interactions with her.

This means that you should try to spend as much time together as possible. Go on dates, hang out with her family, go to events, etc. The more time you spend with her, the more likely it is that she'll start thinking about you in a better light.

However, don't do this every day, avoid texting her a couple days in a row over time. That would seem too desperate. Instead, wait until you feel like she's starting to forget about you.

13. Ask Her Friends to Help You Win Her Back

Your ex-girlfriend's friends can play a big role in getting her back in your life.

If you really want to win your ex girlfriend back, then you should consider asking her friends to help you. Why? Because they know whether or not she still likes you.

And if they see that she doesn't like you anymore, they can also help you by telling you what you did wrong so you can fix it.

You can do simple things like getting them to text her to tell her that you've been thinking of her and that you miss her.

If you didn't burn any bridges with her friends and they still like you, then it makes this process much easier.

14. Be Assertive Instead of Aggressive

Instead of being aggressive, try being assertive. What does this mean? Well, it means that you should be confident in yourself and your actions. You shouldn't apologize for anything if you did nothing wrong.

I think you get the picture!

15. Get Her To Agree To Give You Another Chance

At this point, you should be in a very good position to get her to agree to giving you another chance. You should know yourself by her signals when it's the right time to ask her.

When you're ready to ask her, make sure that you're prepared. Make sure that you have something nice to say to her. Don't come off as overly needy or clingy. Just talk to her about whatever you want to talk about.

Don't force her into agreeing to give you another chance. Let her decide if she wants to continue dating you or not.

Also, don't pressure her into saying yes. She may just be going through a bad phase where she's having trouble deciding between you and someone else.

Give It Time For Her To Decide

The last thing you want to do is push her into making a decision. This will only lead to an argument.

So, let her decide. Wait patiently for her to respond. When she finally agrees to give you another chance, then you can proceed to move forward with the next steps.


By now, you should have all the ammo necessary to get your ex-girlfriend back. All you need to do is follow any (or all) of these 15 tips and you'll have a good chance to win her back.

Remember, it's never too late to start over. Just be sure 100% that you want her back in your life.

Don't play games and be that guy. Karma is a bitch, so act wisely. 

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